S.U.N.S.C.R.E.E.N

'Wear Sunscreen' by Baz Luhrmann is my personal anthem for life! I try to follow his advice in whatever best possible way I can. The last few days have been quite a nightmare for me with two major heart-breaking encounters at once. I've been a wreck with a broken heart and a numb mind. But like I believe, all the wisdom comes to you only when you hit rock bottom.

So based on my meandering experience, here goes my version of the benefits of sunscreen :)

~ Your parents must always hold utmost priority in your life. You are because they are. Nothing else matters, nothing else should count more than their happiness. Be there for them at all times, make them proud, make them happy and make their life worthwhile by being your best only for them.

~ Family is what creates a life. Love the people who are your family and love them unconditionally. Money will come and go. Friends might distance themselves. Your lover will not care enough. But the only people who'd stick by you through the darkest hours is those you call family.

~ Don't be afraid to tell someone how much they mean to you or how much you care about them. Even though you might know that person for just a month, a week, a day or may be a few hours. "Human contact...however brief...can change people" (Quote from '10 Items or Less'...one of my favorite films). Everybody likes appreciation, acceptance, affection and adulation. Give it freely even if you don't receive any in return. You will never know the marvel of your words or gestures unless they touch another heart....another soul.

~ It's absolutely alright to let someone who hardly knows you see your most vulnerable side. We simply worry a lot about what other would perceive of us if they get a glimpse of our weaknesses. But what the heck! God made us human and not Superman/Superwoman. We have the right to be a little psyched, a little maniacal, a little too weak, a little broken and a little too messed up. There's nothing wrong in being somewhat imperfect once in a while or for that matter for always. Perfection is for losers, the winners understand the beauty of being imperfect in their own ways.

~ Your true friends are the one's who look you into the eye and tell you the truth. If you're wrong they'll slap you and if you're right they'll pat your back. Accept what they say. Though we know ourselves best, sometimes it's good to surrender and obey.

~ A real life is that which surprises you. The one which can take you to zenith and nadir in a blink of an eye. It's not easy, it's not fair, it's absolutely not what you'd imagined or hoped it to be - but well it's LIFE! The idea is to experience, to learn, to enjoy, to cry and to move on. As one story ends, another begins. Always be open to what life has to offer. Have faith that whatever it offers is for your greater good even though you might not understand it right then. Sooner or later the answers will unfold and everything will make sense.



But in the end, trust Baz Lurhmann...his words make a hell lot of sense :)
Wear Sunscreen

The Art of 'Moving On'

Atleast once in our lives we've been told by friends, family, colleagues, well-wishers or even random people - one of these statements - "Move on yaar, it wasn't meant to be/worth it"; "Dude you deserve so much more, just forget about it"; "He/she doesn't realize what they've lost by losing you" ; "I am so glad it's over. I always knew you're making a big mistake" and so many more condolences, pitiable looks...blah blah blah...

My random thoughts on some ways to reach the so called 'moved on' phase based on two personality types (hereon referred to as 'PT') and two situations (hereon referred to as 'S'):

1. S: The Dumped One - Where you were the one who was still in love/ the one who wanted to work it out/ the one hanging on

PT: The Feeler - You're an emotional wreck. Your heart's broken and you can feel each piece of it still beating for the one who's dumped you. No matter what everyone around says you keep emptying the buckets of tears from your eyes. Here's what might help you :: Take a paper and pen. Write down all the reasons that your loved one gave for dumping you. Mentally analyze whether it was because of you or anything related to you or because of him/her and his/her priorities/expectations. If you realize it was a result of your stupidity then stop crying. You've learnt what not to do in your next attempt at falling in love. If it was because of him/her then just let go. You can't change people or plead them to love you. If they don't, they just don't. There's nothing wrong with you or them, so stop the self-pity act or the blame game. Be happy if you had a good time being with them and start a brand new story. Life's too short to hang on to one long story. Change it up and smile again.


PT: The Thinker - You're a mind master. Your heart's broken but you are more worried about the 5 W's and 1 H of the failure of your relationship. You have left no stone unturned in analyzing the situation and thinking it out loud. Here's what might help you :: Your heart is anyway vulnerable, so be kind to yourself and give your mind some rest. Stop thinking so much because not everything that happens has a reason or logic. There are things that are out of our control and beyond our understanding, especially people and their behaviours. Give the person who dumped you the benefit of doubt, try to feel what they are going through and understand their feelings behind their action. This will let you hate them a little less and help you de-stress a little more.

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2. S: The Ditcher - Where you were the devil/ the cheater / the one who didn't care about others' feelings / heartless / cold / indifferent

PT: The Feeler - Even in this case, you're still a wreck. You can't help but feel sorry for doing what you've done. Inspite of the rational decision, your heart is still sad. Here's what might help you :: If you've cheated on your partner, guess what? Go ahead - FEEL SORRY! If you've decided to dump your partner because of XYZ reasons, then you've already made a choice. So there's no point in feeling sorry or sad, it ain't helping either of you. Since you are a sensitive person, you would have thought over the reasons and the consequences before shooting the gun. Trust yourself, your instincts and your decision. If you've taken a stand, stick by it and don't complicate things.


PT: The Thinker - You are a free bird now. You exactly know why you've done whatever you have and feel absolutely proud of your actions. The reasons behind your decision are all justified. Here's what might help you :: If you have thought through the reasons why you are dumping your partner, then you sure aren't guilty of anything. But sometimes feelings are stronger than thoughts and your partner might need you to show them that you did truly feel for them atleast a while back and all of it wasn't as bad. Don't be harsh, rude and indifferent. Instead understand that you're about to hurt someone's feelings and feel what you'd feel in their place. You are free to make your choices but you do not have the right to damage someone else's belief and faith. Give an explanation, communicate openly and let your partner drift away without hating you.

And as Audrey Hepburn quotes "Your heart just breaks, that's all. But you can't judge or point fingers. You just have to be lucky enough to find someone who appreciates you!"

And I Miss....

Dated June 6, 2009 on Facebook Notes.

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From the past two years spent at SIMC ....



1. The Orientation Day - 15th June 07: Nervous faces...racing heartbeats...curious minds...familiar voices...and anxious thoughts!


2. Kothari - Room # 205, 306, 405, 406: New place but the warmest people!


3. Viman Nagar Campus - Classroom # 501 - The beige carpet, the somewhat uncomfortable chairs but the beauty sleeping on them! :)


4. Backbenchers - Rocking Stars of Batch 2009


5. Tapri: cutting chai, wada pav, samosa pav wid mirchi, kanda bhaji...and our sweetest Mavshi! :)


6. Hira General Stores: Our Savior for the whole goddam year...Bread, Butter, Cheese, Maggi, Colddrinks, Ciggarettes (Not for me), Gossips, Wafers, Biscuits, Ice-Creams, Coffee...ohhh its neverendin!


7. Trips: Panchgani and Khandala - Bestest Times Ever...the bondin...the sobbin...the carin...the sharin..the madness..the dancin...the joy! Happiness! :)


8. Gujju Garba: Miss ma lovely gujju ladies and the not so gujju ladies who joined us at MRA/ Khandala and danced their heart out! ;) Navratri night at Lavale !!!


9. AS aka The Anupam Siddhartha: The warmer side of him away from SIMC Land!


10. Birthday Parties: Both @ Kothari Rooms/Terrace and Lavale Campus :)


11. The LIFT: Viman Nagar Campus - One which was strictly for Staff but crowded with 14 SIMCians @ daily rush hours! ;)


12. The Warning Letter Tension: Phew...Not Wearing Sleeveless...Capris...Skirts...Transparent Clothes lol...Shaved Beards...ROUND Neck Tees...Graphic Teess...Oh Gawd...we survived it!


13. ATTENDANCE!!!!! Present Sir...Present Ma'am....Yes...I am Here...OHHH F*** I missed it! lollllll


14. Lavale Campus: The vastness...the hills...the weather...the architecture....the people...the MESS...the canteen...the Hostel...the swimming pool...the Gym...the TT / Badminton Courts...the Cycles...The Recreation Area....The Amphitheatre :)...The Coffee Shop :)


15. Bus Trips: From Lavale to SB Road and Back...the most important introspection was done during those! ;)


16. Screenings: Movie for the Day - "How much/many can you Tolerate?" lolllllllll


17. The Debates in class....non-stop...arguments...fights...throwing the professor out of the freakin class! lolll...Remember days of Nandita Khaire, Ramashastri....:)


18. UKC and Conference Room: The long long lectures...."U B*******...good for nothing...useless Rascals!" lollllllll.....I Wish we had one last Farewell Speech from him ;)


19. The Breakfast: The best meal in the mess....ohhh I so miss it!


20. The Students' Council: President's call/sms...Hot hot discussions...planning...some more planning....brainstormin...DISPERSE! ;)


21. Projects/ Assignments / Exams/ Class Tests / Self STUDY/ TNG's - Deadlines!!! Bring it on!!


22. The COMPULSION OF Events - FOC, DAM, seminars, conferences, talks, chats, sleeps!!! blah blah blah OM Shanti! (PR Batch 09)


23. The Learnings - About communication, PR, AD, Journo, AV...most of all about people, about yourself and about LIFE!


24. PR Batch 2009 - Each and every soul...I still remember your roll numbers by heart! ;) Miss you all!


25. SIMC Batch 2009 - We really did BRING IT ON! From Orkut community to Facebook Networking...Please stay connected! ;)


And I Miss all of it...hope you all do!!! :)



Cheers,

Drashti

Who are we to judge?

"Don’t be judgmental. See people in a better light and like them for what they are. Because no matter what your perception is…someone somewhere surely sees them as a ‘masterpiece’ of all of God’s creations!"

This is something I’d written a while ago and since it was my gtalk status message for the longest time, a lot of people took the liberty to copy and post it as their statuses or their FB walls. Nevertheless, that’s when I realized that people do resonate with this thought and I think I should delve into a deeper thinking about it.

How often do we find ourselves being judged or judging others? I guess the occurrence of this phenomenon is very frequent and moreover at a subconscious level. You meet people and you start judging them – the way they are dressed, the way they speak, the way they behave, how smart or dumb they are, how well they live up to your preconceived notions, are they worthy of knowing and spending your precious time with or just letting go of? And I have seen this happening not just in professional lives but at a higher rate in personal relationships and acquaintances. Every time I find myself in this situation, I ask myself “who am I to pass judgments about this person I hardly even know?” It takes us a lifetime to understand people, even those whom we’ve been with and known for years. Then how can we judge people whom we’ve barely spent any time with or those whom we don’t have the patience to understand better? There are so many instances when we find ourselves judging our parents, our siblings, our closest friends and our better-halves. Why do we have to make them the victims of our judgment? Aren’t these the people who love you unconditionally? The one’s who know you inside-out? The one’s who’d be there for you during the sunny days and the darkest nights? The one’s whom we call our support system, those we depend upon, those we trust and care about? If they mean so much to us, then what gives us the right or for that matter even a thought of judging them!

Life’s pretty simple and relationships can be equally simpler if we try and see people in a better light. I do believe that people are complex beings, some not so very amiable and some that make you smile by just being themselves. But at the end, it’s how you see them, at what pedestal you put them, with what value you tag them and the amount of power you give them to influence you. I had read a quote somewhere which said, “We don’t see things as they are, we see things as we are!” Doesn’t it make sense? When we begin seeing people differently, appreciate their positive sides and ignore the negative…we not only help them by being fair but help ourselves become better human beings. It’s as simple as that.

For the past few months now, I’ve been at the centre stage of this process I refer to as “the arranged marriage circus”. And I don’t call it a circus because it’s a hilarious thing to be a part of but I call it by that name so that I can laugh about it a little and get over the emotional trauma thprocess leads to or the punch that it gives to your self esteem and self respect time and again. I have been told that one must be practical about this whole thing because after all it’s an arrangement between two people…two families. I’ve been trying to be as practical as I can be but deep down I am an emotional fool and what I fail to understand is that how “marriage” – the most important resolution of one’s life, the deepest emotional risk….can be a well-thought practical decision rather than a deeper heartfelt commitment?

I had made it very clear to my parents from day 1 that I won’t judge a guy I meet by his first impression. It’s just not fair to him or me. How can one conclude whether a person is ‘eligible’ to be your life partner after speaking random things with him/her for an hour or two over a cup of coffee? This is not a job interview wherein the job description or the aptitude needs to fit a set of pre-decided company requirements. Isn’t it supposed to be a process of understanding people beyond their face value, knowing them better than just a few words they rambled when you first met, finding a common ground of things that make each other happy or sad and finally isn’t it all about letting your heart feel rather than letting your mind decide? Fortunately or unfortunately, it’s only me who’s been thinking so much and analyzing things while other’s don’t really know what the hell they are up to.

Well we’ll just have to wait and watch for what’s in store and how life’s going to unfold for me. But I’d like to leave you’ll with a thought to ponder upon…"Who are we to judge someone when each one of us is God’s masterpiece?” The next time you find yourself turning on the ‘Judgment’ button – STOP! Give it a moment and THINK! :)

It’s Not That...

It’s not that she is lonely

Or that her friends aren’t enough

But sometimes she needs a pal

Who melts her from inside while on the surface she seems tough!

It’s not that she wants to belong

Just because everyone around is taken

But sometimes she desires a companion

Who knows her in a way that even she had forsaken!

It’s not that she is fragile

Or that she needs someone to lean on

But sometimes she wants a pillar

Whose existence is the only thing that never leaves her alone!

It’s not that she is running out of time

Or that she’s ageing faster than she could perceive

But sometimes she wishes to live with a devoted soul

The moments shared with whom is the only life she’ll ever believe!

It’s not that she is scared

Of walking this life’s path in darkness

But sometimes she yearns for a ray of light

That shows her how hitches can also bring along happiness!

It’s not that she feels incomplete

Or that love is what would fill the space

But sometimes her heart aches for a lover

Who adores the emptiness in her with all its grace!

- Drashti :)

Better Late Than Never !!!

Phew…this busy-hectic-workaholic (I’d like to believe that) life of mine has kept me away from a lot of things I used to do just for “myself”. Things like dreaming, writing, sketching, dancing amongst others. And while I kept doing things that weren’t really the one’s I would want to see myself doing, one day I realized that I was turning 25! Oh hell yeah…I turned onto the other side of the twinkling twenties on 28^th June this year. Growing a year older is always a depressing moment for me and turning 25 surely felt the worst. Anyways so I decided that since life seems to be moving at a pace that I am unable to catch up with, it's about time I go back to doing things that give me joy – so here I come back to what I love doing most – talk CRAP!

When I graduated from SIMC in 2009, I had read this article in Mumbai Mirror titled “Unsteady Quarters” and I think that’s the topic I want to write about in my blog at this point in time.

As Wikipedia cites “The quarter-life crisis occurs shortly after a young person – usually an educated professional, in this context – enters the "real world".

I believe this so called “quarter life crisis” doesn’t leave a single soul. We all go through it in someway or the other, some with a greater intensity and some lesser. But moreover I feel that it’s not really about a job or a relationship. It doesn’t circle around friends or family. It truly is about who “You” are from the realms of your very own existence to what you or others perceive you to be. This is a phase where we struggle not to mend a poorly paying job or an unfulfilled relationship, a friendship that’s gotten bitter or a rift with our parents. We struggle and struggle really hard to put together pieces of ourselves - some which are broken over the years, some which are lost on the way, some that are newly found and those that we are yet to create.

Taking cues from my own life over the last 5 years and those of my close friends, I have come to the conclusion that we all want to find just one and I repeat just one “identity” that defines what we are and not what we or others want us to be. Yes! We do work hard and party harder. We do want a fat salary to get deposited into our accounts each month end. We do want to get rewarded for our talent and efforts. We do want to make our parents proud. We do want to gift them a world tour fully paid by us. We madly want to fall in love. We want to nurture a strong relationship. We want to be committed and we want to plan a life.

But hey! Before we accomplish all of these…we want to find “ourselves”. We want to know what makes us happy and what makes us cry. What matters and what we care a damn about.

And that is why it’s called a crisis! Because you may suddenly realize that a job paying a fat salary does not bring you as much happiness as a job where you love what you do every minute of those hours you are stuck in office. Your parents who didn’t seem to understand why you scored such low marks for all these years have now become your best friends who know and understand what exactly you want out of life. The huge circles of friends are now reduced to just a handful of close friends who you know are going to stick with you through the most difficult times. It has now dawned upon you that a high school sweetheart might not always turn out to be the one you get married to because after so many years of being in a relationship and growing together, you know that he or she is not the one. It is not that you’ve stopped loving them…you just aren’t “in love” with them.

Like I always say, “get to know your own self first…it’ll be much easier to know what you want out of your life and from others who are of part of your life!”

So dear friends, quarter life crisis to me is nothing but a phase of introspection, that of self awareness and getting to know the only person whom you haven’t spent enough time with – and that is “YOU, Yourself and Thee.” :)

Being "The Change"

“Aspiring, Achieving, Being the Change….”

When you decide to “Be the change, that you want to see in the world”, you realize how clear your vision of the world has become. This is exactly what I learnt, in the most cherished moments that I spent at “The Akanksha Foundation” as part of my social communication internship in the month of April 2008.

The curriculum at Symbiosis Institute of Media & Communication, alongwith media studies helps us become better individuals, stronger and more kind hearted by the time we leave this sacred village of knowledge. And this was proven by the one month of social communication internships, scheduled in the month of April 2008. As said earlier, I did my stint of social work or let me put as selfless work at the Akanksha Foundation, which is a non – profit organization based out of Mumbai working towards the education of the less privileged children from the slums of the city.

The first day at Akanksha was a thriller, purely because there were so many people who were eager to welcome me and share their personal experiences and journey at Akanksha. It indeed set the right mood to jump onto the joy ride that I saw, each employee or rather didi’s and bhaiyya’s of Akanksha took, everyday of their lives. The smiling faces, the abundant energy and the vibrant walls coloured by kids, made the office the most comfortable place to be in. The main purpose of my tenure with them was to assist Ruchika didi, General Manager with all the presentations, designing, writing scripts, gifts, certificates and other event co-ordination for the Annual General Meeting to be held on 23rd April, from start till end. My challenge was to ensure everything was perfectly in place for the gala day and that it was a flawless evening of celebration, an evening that each member of the organization eagerly awaited for the entire year. The AGM is the annual event whereby all Akanksha students, teachers, mentors, volunteers, staff members, donors and board members come together to celebrate the year gone by and look forward for another beautiful year bringing smiles to millions who are a part of the mission.

The most interesting part about doing anything at Akanksha was the touch of youth and innocence in all the work. Every little space in the organization had a feeling of happiness and sunshine. My work started from day 1, by designing invites for the AGM, the theme for which was Sunshine 2008. Even for making the invites we used actual hand painted artwork made by the kids at their Art class which made the invite an imperfectly perfect piece of beauty. From then on every design I created, like the presentation templates, the centre score cards as well as the diary which was gifted at the AGM, was a creation made out of something drawn and painted by the children themselves. What this showed to me was that children who are the very essence for Akanksha’s existence are present in every part of their being. They are the focus and at no
point are they forgotten in the mundane chores at the office.

I was humbled by the affection and love I received from each member I worked with in the office for my different projects. I was more than welcomed and helped at every stage by one and all, and this feeling made me a part of the organization even though for a short period of time. I could ask any didi or bhaiyya to provide me with needed information or seek their guidance without hesitation and they would readily help me with their ever smiling faces. Another lesson learnt, always help people around you and do it with all your heart.

The work that I completed as part of the AGM preparations was designing the invites, certificates, diary, presentations and score cards; preparing a short film for the graduating students of the year 2008, helped in the scripting of the acts to be played on stage on the final day, content re-development for the website and the final day event co-ordination. The motivation that Ruchi didi provided me at all times was something I will never forget all my life. It was purely because of her belief in me and my work that I could handle the whole event confidently. It makes me feel honoured to have had Ruchi didi and Shaheen didi as my mentors. Their dedication and involvement with the organization is worth applause and it makes me proud to have been associated with such clean hearted and selfless women of substance.
During the one month I spent with them, I got to learn everything about the organization since the AGM was an all encompassing event which involved each little part of Akanksha’s functions for the entire year. In the beginning itself I got an opportunity to interact with members from all departments and understand what their role was in this fun family. It was indeed a humbling experience to witness the amount of selfless work every individual puts in and this boosted my confidence and made me work harder for the days to come. Thanks to my boss, Ruchi didi, everyone in the office knew I came from SIMC and was treated with respect and love. They readily shared their work and helped me with my projects without hesitation. I also got an opportunity to get involved in teachers’ meetings, staff meetings, goal setting meetings and volunteer briefings, which made me, see through the vision and mission of Akanksha very clearly.

All my days at Akanksha were fruitful only when I saw the million smiles in the Sophia Bhabha Auditorium on the day of the AGM and saw the event flow as graciously as I has envisioned. It gives me immense pleasure to have been a part of an organization that gives millions of children a reason to live, a reason to smile and to ASPIRE, ACHIEVE and BE THE CHANGE!!!

Personal Growth and Learning

Though I spent a very short time at the office, I learnt many small things that make huge differences, and more importantly a difference in someone else’s life. The people at Akanksha have taught me to be more patient and tolerant with colleagues, to understand human beings in a better way, to be extremely happy with the work that I do and do it with all my heart, smile at every obstacle and accept challenges with courage and determination. The enthusiasm and eager will of every individual working with Akanksha has shown me that it gives us immense satisfaction and inner peace to work towards the betterment and happiness of others, especially those who need our help and support at a very young age. The most important thing that I take back from Akanksha is, if you have a dream, you must see it turn into Reality!